I juggle too many things in my life. My motto was always, “Say yes and show up.” It’s been an excellent way to live my life since moving to Hawaii. However, I feel I may have reached a saturation point.
Saying yes and showing up is a no-fail, awesome way to be successful, and I don’t want to change my motto—at least not completely. Yet it seems I’ve reached a point in my life where I need to make some choices. I need to say no to some things, and I am stubbornly holding on to my say yes philosophy.
This past year I’ve allowed myself, for the first time in 8 years, to fully commit to a romantic relationship. It’s been outstanding. However, along with this fantastic addition to my life, I’ve also allowed myself to stay home and cuddle on the couch (something I didn’t previously own) and watch TV (also something I didn’t previously own) with my wonderful man (which I didn’t previously own…I mean, have). When you count up those hours of domestic bliss, it can be significant. Somewhere to the tune of 10 or 12 hours a week!
I also suffer(ed) from something I call ‘Dick Brain’ that happens in the beginning of a relationship…or in my case, still happening. That yummy, delicious distraction of being in love and infatuated. There is no fast cure for this ailment.
My calendar is filled with the most amazing adventures and events, and I don’t want it any other way. My current struggle is finding a work/life balance where I can keep saying yes and showing up, and still find time to appease my introverted self. I have two full-time jobs I love. Not only do I love both of my jobs, I live in the most expensive state in the country where two jobs are the norm in order to survive. I’m lucky to do what I love, and love what I do.
I also carve out weeks during the year to travel and see my daughter, because I can’t imagine spending more than a few months away from her at a time. She’s my favorite person in the world, and God knows where she will be at any given moment in time—Norway, New York City, the Arctic Circle. I’m not kidding. This is a real list.
So, now that I sound like a whiney little bitch with first world problems – I concede. I am. I’m also tired. I live paycheck to paycheck and love every minute of it. I’ll die before I have a chance to retire, and that’s okay. It’s okay because I’m happy with my life. I shall work my ass off, cuddle with my man, and fly to the freaking arctic circle if I must. If these are my current problems in life, I am privileged beyond compare.
But let me clear, my privilege is not taken for granted. With a combination of luck and good choices, I created a life I’m pleased to live. It was a difficult road, but my menu of life choices allowed me to the opportunity to choose wisely, and I recognize not everyone is ordering from the same menu.
However, I still need to work on that life balance. I have what my daughter calls FOMO – fear of missing out. What if I don’t go to this event, or that function? I may miss an opportunity of a lifetime! Then again, I may miss out cuddling on the couch with the love of my life while we watch Outlander and he plays with my hair. Choices. Choose wisely friends. Good night and aloha. xo